About me

Hi, my name is Nelson, and no one likes me. Every morning before I get ready for school, I check my phone, myspace messages, and email to see who my predators for the day are because kids take turns picking on me. Believe it or not, a new sign up sheet is posted on the wall inside the boys' and girls' locker rooms every day. I used to be cool, but one day, in the 7th grade, I tripped over some kid's bag and fell face-first into the principal's lunch. I'm a junior in high school now and the kid's haven't forgotten. I've changed my number four times, switched email addresses and pimped out my myspace with hot girls and alcoholic beverages, but the messages roll in like clockwork. I don't understand: I'm a good basketball player, my grades aren't that bad, and I don't have a curfew. I can't go online without seeing a bulletin on myspace about how I apparently can't keep track of my bowel movements...I don't remember that happening...but everyone else does. They all say I'm a loser, that I smell, and shouldn't be allowed in stores without a leash and collar. I don't know what to do to make them stop.

You know what else? I found this website. It just makes me want to hide at home all day and night.